- Nelson Mandela
Wise words by an extraordinary man. Someone who managed to live a life that served as an inspiration to the entire world. He created what he wanted, against all odds, and emerged a peaceful and loving being, despite all the hate, anger and injustice that was projected onto him. How can we begin to live and embody that philosophy of life? What does it really mean to be in charge of your life, to be the creator of what you are, what you have and what you become?
The truth is, whether you are aware of it or not, and whether your life is the way you want it to be, or not – you are already the master who designed your own fate and the captain sailing your soul to where it is now. Simply by being alive, this power is mobilised. You are not a victim of circumstances or ‘frowned upon’ by ‘God’. You are exactly what you have been creating…and so is your life, the people in your life, the job you have, the hobbies and habits you cultivate – the wonderful things you are so grateful for, the painful experiences that make you question the meaning of life or whether there is a God. It’s all yours. Your current life is 100% the product of your beliefs, imagination, assumptions and attitudes towards yourself, your life and your thoughts around what you deserve.
Whatever you believe you are, you will be. Whatever you believe you deserve, you will have. Whatever life you can imagine living, is yours. Whatever attitude you foster towards yourself and the world is what you and your life will reflect back to you. It all starts and ends, with YOU.
Most of us experience two major issues when creating our own destiny.
1. Conscious vs subconscious mind
You might ‘buy into’ the notion of creating what you want in your life. You set your mind fully and wholly on what it is you wish to create – a car, a house, a happy marriage, a new baby, healing from terminal illness - and you focus on this - daily, with commitment and devotion. Wonderful. Yet you are not getting what you are creating? The truth is that you might think, in your conscious mind that you are authentic in creating what you want, but your unconscious mind is full of limiting beliefs or attitudes that are the complete opposite of what you are consciously putting out there. So you end up creating the exact opposite of what you intend or hope to. Your subconscious mind holds those beliefs that are so ingrained and deep seated that you don’t even know you have them anymore – they operate on autopilot. It’s second nature to you - you don’t even have to think about it.
If this is what’s happening for you, then make a commitment to yourself to dig a little deeper. Begin to uncover your true beliefs about having a happy marriage, a car, a house, healing, or whatever it is that is eluding you. You will find there are some profound blockages there, which form your true intention – the opposite of what you think you want. If you’re constantly hitting a brick wall – even with what you perceive to be the best of intentions, begin to ask yourself: ‘what are the pay-offs for me NOT getting a new car, being healed, finding a partner?’; ‘What would happen if I did get what I wanted/how would that change me?’; ‘Do I really believe I deserve what I am hoping to create?’
By taking the time to systematically work your way through those deep-rooted belief systems, you may uncover that you are holding on to some ideas that hasn’t served you for a long time. They might not even make sense to you anymore or it may be that you need to do some deep work to dislodge those beliefs. Either way, isn’t it worth doing if these beliefs are keeping you from living the life that you deserve? Let me tell you – you DESERVE whatever it is you want. Do whatever you need to, to get to believe that wholly and fully!
2. Consciously Expecting What You Don’t Want.
Some of us don’t even beat around the bush. We don’t even pretend to think we can have what we want. It goes something like this: ‘I’ll apply for the job but I probably won’t get it’; ‘I’ll do this for my wife but I know she won’t notice or appreciate it’; ‘I’ll give the team this new process to make life easier but they won’t stick to it’. Then things don’t work out or something goes wrong and our immediate response is: ‘I knew it’; ‘go figure’; ‘that’s just my luck’; ‘told you so!’
But wait – There’s MORE! Creating our world on a day-to-day basis is very profoundly affected by our words: ‘The people I work with are all stupid’; ‘my partner is cheating on me’, everyone in my life lets me down’, ‘my life is one big struggle’. Imagine yourself being a wizard – everything you say is a spell that you’re casting. Everything you say, and believe, is what you create. You’re creating whatever comes out of your mouth. “My life is one big struggle. Yep…just as you ordered ma’am!
Your wizardry style might not change over night, because once you have learnt to watch your words because you understand the power they have in creating your life, you will still need to begin to truly believe in what you aspire to create. But all success is the sum of little efforts – so start today and take the first step by cultivating a language that spells out what you WANT in your life.
If you find yourself in this state of expecting and speaking the worst-case scenario, feeling done wrong by and victimized - begin by pausing between thoughts, between words, between actions. Aspire to think, speak and act according to what you WANT. NOT according to what you DON’T want. Let your words, thoughts and actions begin to paint a picture of what life is like when everything is exactly how you would want them to be. Speak, think and act as if it is all already true, already happening right now. Just go straight into expressing your gratitude for this beautiful life that you’re so masterfully creating.
Now try this: You’re cultivating a language which speaks of the things you love - the things you want more of in life. This immediately shifts your focus onto those things in your life that you can form positive thoughts and language about. Needing to speak only positively shifts your focus to those things that you do feel positive about, right? This means your focus shifts from negatives to positives. From the things you don’t want, to the things you love and feel grateful for. You have the power to create what you focus on – and now that your focus is on positive things – more positive things that you want and are grateful for, enter your life. Slowly, the positives you’re focusing on and bringing into your life starts to permeate every other area of life. You are beginning to create the life you would love to live. You are the Master of your fate – the captain of your soul – by choosing to focus on what you want to create.
Take some time to figure out which of these two categories apply to you. Notice where you have been holding yourself back. Take your awareness out of your mind when you try to ascertain where you are truly at. Get in touch with your soul. Your soul is the source of infinite wisdom, so let it guide you as to where your small effort today has to start.